Feels Like The First Time
Or, Welcome! I'm doing Substack again, but I feel the purpose this time.
Hello! Matt O’Donnell here. You may know me from playing bass on stage with some truly fantastic artists over the past 16 years, listening to my discussions with passionate people on my podcast Matt O’Donnell Wants To Know, remembering my long-lost role as Managing Editor of Bass Frontiers Magazine, or overhearing my hot takes about…anything I feel like talking about.
Some of you are experiencing this Substack for the first time, while others are still subscribed from my previous foray into the platform. We’re here because I want to create another lane of myself now that Matt O’Donnell Wants To Know has found its footing. If you listen to the podcast, I end every episode with the Socratic tagline, “The best answer to a question is usually another question.” This is especially true of my conversations with guests because it’s only by asking questions that I learn more about them and what drives them. If that is my primary mechanism, I never get to say anything or muse about anything (at least not without wasting everybody’s time). So, by properly utilizing a Substack newsletter1, I can present some things I’m interested in sharing or, more importantly, discussing.
Can I be honest and vulnerable for a minute? You may be asking a simple question right now: Why? I didn't have that answer the last time I tried to write for Substack. Truthfully, I’m not sure I have it now, either, but I’m definitely closer. As part of the lead-up to launching Matt O’Donnell Wants To Know, I humbly said that people had been asking me (or straight-up telling me) to create a podcast for an entire decade. I didn’t know it then, but my small audience for posts on Substack was in the same vein. Being more confident in this has taken me a few years and a lot of being able to use therapy as a space to admit things about myself that I previously thought were ridiculous. Here we go…
A significant conflict I have had in life is that many people I know consider me to be really smart (whatever that means)2. My response to that, out loud or otherwise, is that they’re very kind, but I know some truly brilliant people and respect, admire, and emulate others who are even more unattainable. Therefore, what can I possibly offer? I’ve at least reached a compromise where I can feel comfortable in believing this, but I think I’m justified in pointing out that I’m not sure there’s anything I know that isn’t accessible to everyone. In that acceptance, I can now more clearly see that there’s a genuine reason why people ask for my recommendations, opinions, and advice.
Without going into excruciating detail, I’ve come to understand that perhaps my path forward in life is all about taking the things I know (or will learn) and applying them to the people and situations around me. In the past, I likely would have tried to shy away by saying that any repository of my thoughts, feelings, and tastes like this was just for me, and it was a bonus if someone else liked it. Nope, not anymore. It’s been proven to me that there’s interest, even if not everything is for everyone.
I think that’s as much internal study as I need to share for now. As the kids say, I just needed to say that with my whole chest.
I plan to present a Substack newsletter on Tuesdays that alternate with the release schedule for Matt O’Donnell Wants To Know. You’ll get a podcast on Tuesday and a newsletter the next, and so on. However, I wanted to use this podcast release date to launch the revised Substack, so I’ll present one next week to steady the schedule. Musings and recommendations will begin in earnest next time. In the meantime, tell your friends. Get them on the subscriber list. That’s the only way we all help these things grow.
I do want to leave you with a lovely story to end, though.
A couple of weeks ago, I was honored to officiate the renewal of vows for my wife Amanda’s grandparents for their 60th anniversary. I originally got my online ordination to marry my brother-in-law and his wife and must have done such a bang-up job that I was asked to do this, too.
Amanda’s family originally gifted her grandparents a big group trip so we could all be together and celebrate. When it was mentioned that we were planning to renew their wedding vows, I didn’t feel like the idea meant that much to them. They seemed to just love the idea of having everyone together, no matter what we did, which is very on-brand for them. This isn’t to say I wasn’t taking what would be said in a vow renewal seriously. When we got to the moment, both of her grandparents were very emotional about doing it in an extraordinary way. My remarks had a lot to do with all the things that have happened in the world in the time since they had said their original, binding wedding vows. It was sort of my little soapbox to promote my idea of using the wisdom of age and experience in helping pass along the wonder of the world around us to those who might not notice that there’s a kaleidoscope of existence out there. Here are the remarks and vows in full:
“We are so lucky and blessed to be here today. Your lives together in matrimony have seen an incredible number of things happen in the world:
-Man walked on the moon.
-11 different US Presidents.
-Only five popes and two monarchs of England, though…
-It would still be 2 years before the premiere of the movie The Graduate. 7 years until The Godfather.
-Saturday Night Live wouldn’t premiere for another 10 years.
-The bicentennial of America.
-The dawn of a new millennium.
It has seen:
-3 children
-12 grandchildren
-4 great-grandchildren
-countless friends and loved ones
come onto the scene.
Your marriage's lifespan is a testament to everyone that transformative experiences are all around them, helping them see a deeper meaning of life and the joy of existence. Always remember to wear the most incredible things that have happened to you or around you on your sleeve. There’s a gigantic life and a world built on our shared experiences out there.
It’s often said that you can tell the presence of the Holy Spirit in something by the fruit that it bears. Take a moment and look at this orchard around you. I’d say that’s all the proof you need.
It’s time to renew the vows of your marriage. Please repeat after me:
"Thank you for taking a chance on me and for taking me as your (husband / wife) because it’s changed my life. Loving you and being loved by you has been the best part of every day for the past SIXTY years. Thank you for showing me what true partnership can be."
Now, by the power vested in me by whatever office at the pearly gates handles this kind of thing, I now pronounce you STILL husband and wife!
You may kiss the bride!”
See you back here next Tuesday!
Unfortunately, my initial effort here was relatively poor. While I did share some well-received posts, I failed to establish a solid structure for myself. As a result, I hoped to conjure content that others would find engaging out of nowhere. The situation could aptly be described as “a fool’s errand.”
There’s still a part of me that can’t believe I just typed that for public consumption.